3 things I’ve learned anyone should do before getting involved in a relationship!

3 things I’ve learned anyone should do before getting involved in a relationship!


So it took a lot of pausing and reflecting to learn what I’m about to tell you, but it was something I already knew that I needed a reminder of. You see, we think we’ll be happy or complete once we find “Mr right” or “Mrs right” or when we get married, when we get that dream job or we’ll be complete once we have children…etc. The list is endless.

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But the truth is before we get into a relationship, we need to know that…..

1: We are whole and complete on our own first – We need to learn the craft of being whole on our own. Believe me, it is indeed a skill we need to learn and master, because not many are comfortable being on their own and most, don’t believe they are whole and complete on their own. And some jump from one failed relationship to the other to feel validated or to escape loneliness.

For me, being on my own is a piece of cake, because that is what I prefer and that is how I recharge. That is also how I reflect, gather my thoughts and stay connected. But, I still thought I needed a man to complete me. Boy! was I wrong.

However, it’s not our fault to think that we need someone to be and feel complete. We’ve been conditioned to think that way by society since Genesis; the kind of mentality which is no longer valid for me. #SocietyFailures

My whole life I’ve seen people considering themselves as a half and refer to their partners as “my other half” which implies that they’re not complete on their own. This is the reason why many people don’t even mind being in a toxic relationship, in order to be and feel complete. #Wrong #ThinkAgain

My dears, if you don’t feel complete on your own, you won’t be in the after- life”either (I call being in a relationship the “after life”, cos’ I literally had none once I was in one) LOL *sigh

I'm complete- post


2: We need to be happy on your own first

Now that we mastered the skill of being whole on our own, we also need to learn being happy on our own.

We are not a half, waiting for our other half to appear. We are already whole. A wo/man cannot make us happy. S/He can only add more to our happiness. Because my dear, that is an inside job and it is our responsibility to make ourselves happy. #TakeResponsibility

Some of us know that most relationships fail because they expect the other person to make them happy. They expect them to be their world! How dare they put that much pressure on their loved ones #DontBeOneOfThem

Ladies, stop expecting your man to be the whole damn cake when truly, he should only be the cherry on top. This also applies to men as well, so don’t think you’ve escaped it.

The bottom line is we need to learn to be able to say I first, before we can say I love you and realise that happiness does not reside in someone else’s pocket.

happiness- post

But you might ask, how does one feel complete and happy on their own?

3: Work on the whole damn cake first- i.e. You

The whole cake is YOU! We all know it takes time and effort to make a cake. Imagine! You have to get the ingredients, bring them home, measure it all up, mix it up, bake it and decorate it. It is a long process. It requires patience, attention and practice to achieve a tasty cake and it will take just as much work for you to feel complete. If you miss an ingredient or your measurements were incorrect, the outcome won’t be as you wished. So be attentive, live in the moment and be grateful for what is already yours.

Nobody buys an unfinished cake!

If you’re asking someone to be your cake when they’re meant to be only the cherry on top, you are asking too much. This is what happens in most relationships and often a reason for breaking up. This is also what happened to me- too much pressure to the point I could not breathe anymore because he wanted me to be the whole cake and I killed my cherry duty in an attempt of being a cake. #SadTimes

So get your ingredients right. Date yourself because you need to get to know you first. You need to know what you like and what you don’t. Spend quality time to learn your values. Because you see, you’re stuck with you for life, so you better love yourself for better or worse. To make it all exciting,  do anything that lights up your soul. Do for yourself what you wanted your wo/man do for you.

For me travelling, reading, being creative, watching moves, eating well, listening to music and dancing renew my soul and they truly make me happy.

Love yourself the way you want someone else to love you. Put yourself first and don’t feel guilty for doing so. Be the person you want to meet. But most of all, whatever you decide to do or wherever you decide to go, go with all of your heart and have fun. And when they see the light they’d want to be part of it too. They’d want to come shine with you. #ComeShineWithMe– (my new hashtag. Isn’t it great?!) 🙂


You get to bake your cake and be it too- and wait for the cherry to drop when it’s time.  No pressure lovelies!

Always With love- Bee


Safe journey!

Oh darling, you must not know me

If you leave, it’s not because of me

If you stay, it’s not because of me

But because of your poor soul, who was unable to see the light in me


I will keep shining even when you don’t see me

I will never stop growing even when you’re not near me

This time I’m stronger and a lot wiser

So nothing can get to the self which is higher than ever


You see, I choose to see the best in people’s souls

Even yours, which needed saving and was crying for happiness

Darling that wasn’t up to me but to thy self

You were looking in the wrong places

I tried to make you see it but I couldn’t get past your stubbornness


The time we had was beautiful and cherished every minute of it

You were free from the very start

Supported you 100% on your new path

But all I can say for now is….

No tears

No regrets

Only the beautiful memories will last

I wish you endless happiness and love

I wish, you truly find yourself and all the love that you have

I wish you only the very best and nothing less in life!

Always with love- Bee 😘😘

5 Relationship lessons I’ve learned in 2017

5 Relationship lessons I’ve learned in 2017!

2017 has been an eventful year for me. It was beautiful, abundant, challenging and certainly full of experiences. It tested my heart’s strength and most definitely, it has shaped me to be a better person.

Here are few things I’ve learned from it that I thought you might benefit from.


1: Trust your instinct no matter what


Whether we like it or not we all have a gut feeling that we ignore consistently. We have such a hard time listening to it and trusting it. We ignore all the signs, we ignore that feeling that can’t be explained and we just go with the flow hoping that one day, that unexplainable feeling will go away. I mean, it’s easier that way right? WRONG!

My favourite Poet Dr Maya Angelou once said “when someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them”. This is SO TRUE, but we become accustomed to ignoring things and we don’t even pay attention to what is. And most of the time, we don’t want to ruin what we have and so we choose to move along with it.

I learned that our instinct is the greatest internal GPS we have and we better start navigating with it before it’s too late; which is why I have begun to listen to the teachings my heart whispers to me; and really understand what is going on, be present in the moment and pay attention more every day. #MattersOfTheHeart


2: Be yourself unapologetically


Being yourself is the ultimate relationship goal. Heck! Being yourself is the ultimate life goal. Often, people change who they truly are to feel accepted and to have that sense of belonging. I used to be that person once, but I’ve started working hard to be myself and accept myself every day, even if it meant people didn’t like it. It’s hard but that’s the only way to freedom.

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In a world full of fakeness, being yourself is like hitting a jackpot- Bersi 🙂

It is the easiest thing you can do in your life and it is the greatest accomplishment you could ever have. #DontBetrayYourself


Compromising is essential but it should not come at the expense of losing yourself in the process. I mean, what fun could that be? Ain’t that the reason why they were drawn to you anyway?! So why are they trying to change you?? It makes no sense at all. At one point, I felt like I was living in someone else’s shadow because I don’t want to upset the person I was with and mainly out of respect. But, what is the point if you’re not getting respected back! You see, changing few things here and there is ok, but changing who you truly are to accommodate others is a no go for me.

I say, don’t be with someone who you’re trying to change/fix. Don’t fall for their potential self and the person they could be one day if they change for you. Be with them because you like them just the way they are. Be with the finished product- ready made!J


3: Set your boundaries


Once the line you’ve drawn is crossed, you know it’s over. But to set boundaries you need to know who you truly are and what your values are. If the person steps on those boundaries, then it is time to have a chat.

Create boundaries. Honor your limits. Say no. Take a break. Let go. Stay grounded. Nurture your body. And if all else fails, breathe deeply. Don’t underestimate breathing, I tell you breathing deeply is one of things that really really helped me release the tension and stress. #WhenInDoubtBreathe

Also remember to nurture your body and respect your body. Go to a Spa if you have to, eat well and feed your mind. Don’t forget yourself just because your boundaries have been crossed and you don’t know how to deal with it. Staying healthy and having a clear mind is important. It helps you focus on what you need to do next. Through it all you have to understand you need you more than anything.


4: Open up and speak your truth- be fearless


Address your issues and talk about them openly like adults. If they can handle your truth then game on! But if you can’t be transparent and are hiding things, you won’t go anywhere. You’ll always be stuck and going back to the same issue over and over again.

If things are not making sense to you and making you uncomfortable then say so. Don’t just bottle it up. So many times I’ve ignored things because I thought they were petty and didn’t deserve attention. But it’s the little things that turn into something big. This is something I really need to work on but I’ve decided to live my life fearlessly a while ago so I’m heading the right way!! #Winning

I made a mistake cos’ I didn’t speak out loud my truth because I was always being considerate and didn’t want to pick the wrong moment to talk about serious things.

And as the lovely Oprah said; “Speaking our truth is the most powerful tool we all have”. #UseIT #SaveYourSelf


5: Open your eyes, stay focused and observe carefully

You can never know people enough and not everyone is loving and caring like you are, so keep your eyes open.  People only see you through their own eyes and they can only understand you from their level of perception.  You see, you can only trust people as much as you trust yourself.

If you’re sneaky, you’ll think they are too. If you cheat, you’ll watch their every move trying to catch them in the act. So an innocent text from or to a friend will look bad in their eyes. But if you trust yourself 100%, then you’ll see others through your trusting heart. If a person says they don’t trust you, it means they don’t trust themselves. They’re sending a big message here, so pay attention.

“He who does not trust enough, will not be trusted”- Lao Tzu

Don’t waste your breath trying to make them believe they should trust you. If the trust is not there and most importantly if they don’t trust themselves- game over! #RunTheHellOut


Always with Love- Bee 🙂

Recipe for tight skin and pores!

Avocado, yoghurt and olive oil mask for tight skin and pores 🙂

Well hello dear readers,

Hope this message finds you well. What I’m about to share is my old recipe I’ve been using for the last few years, but I’ve actually forgotten about it recently. But then When I saw my pores acting I knew it was time to mask up with some fresh avocado and yoghurt.

It’s a no-brainer that winter makes your skin wither- ehhmm it rhymes too 😊– I’m such a poet I even forgot about it 😊 and to avoid dry and flaky skin we exfoliate hard. Don’t get me wrong exfoliating your skin is necessary but too much of it will lead to dryness, acne and larger pores as well. The larger the pores the more prone your skin is to getting acne. The reason being, you’re stripping out your natural skin oil thereby making it dry, flaky and disobedient. Not very nice ha!

So, watch out how many times you exfoliate. I do mine once a week and according to my skin, that is enough.

For the mask you’ll need:

avo mask 1

2 teaspoons of ripe avocado

1 teaspoon of yoghurt

1 teaspoon of olive oil

P.S Please don’t waste a whole avocado. You will not be needing that much. 

Mix all the ingredients and apply it to your face and neck as well for 15-30 minutes, then wash off and enjoy a beautiful, healthy and glowing tight skin. Make sure you use a warm towel to wipe it off and tone your skin as you normally would.

 Applying yogurt will make your skin free from dead skin and it will also tighten your pores. However, it can sting if you have cuts or wounds on your skin so be mindful about this. I remember my sister once complain cos’ her skin was dry and the yoghurt stung her skin. Bless my little munchkin. Muahh!

Avocado is there to moisturize your supposedly dry skin, reduces acne flare-ups and protects the skin against the sun as well.  

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I don’t need to tell you anything about olive oil- it’s just majestic and versatile. My favourite oil of all time. You can just put it anywhere.

You can use it on your skin to moisturize and exfoliate, you can put it on your hair and scalp to condition it and protect your ends, you can use it on your body as a moisturizer, you can put on your salad AND- wait for it for it!  wait for it! – some people actually drink it when they’re constipated- I know right!!!. I’ve not gone thus far yet but I’m tempted “cheeky smile”. I Just think olive oil is the gangster of the oils.

olive oil

I mean what else do we want from this wonderful oil?  But make sure you get the extra virgin, unrefined cold pressed  oil. Trust me you’ll know the difference.

Today’s tip:  If you stayed out in the sun too long, apply avocado directly to sunburned skin to ease pain. This applies to those who are enjoying the sun and loving it but forget their skin is sunburned.

Today’s quote: Know the difference between those who stay to feed the soil and those who come to grab the fruit.

Always with love- Bersi 🙂 x

5 ways I keep my teeth white and my gums healthy!

Well, hello dear folks, I’m coming to you today with these wonderful ways I keep my teeth white and my general oral health on point! I get asked a lot about it, so I thought I’d share and no I’ve never had them whitened. #smiles


me theeth 3- cropped out

1: I do oil pulling once or twice a week minimum. This is the best way to keep your teeth white and your gums healthy as well. It involves swishing a tablespoon of oil in your mouth on an empty stomach for around 20 minutes. This practice draws out toxins in your body, primarily to improve oral health but also to improve your overall health.


coconut man


I usually do it with coconut oil but I also do it with sesame seed oil which is also good for our teeth and gums health. Plague/ tooth tartar is fat soluble which is why oil pulling works as it makes it softer.

sesame seed oil


P.s.  Sesame seed oil has a nutty taste to it, so you might not like it.

If you want to know more about it and find out about my experiences, click at the link below.

oil pulling- teeth whitening at home!  

2: I make a tooth paste using baking soda and coconut oil which is absolutely the bomb! Baking soda has whitening properties and is normally added to a commercial toothpaste.

Here’s how:

  • Mix 4 teaspoons of banking soda powder ( not banking powder) and
  • 2 teaspoons of raw & unrefined coconut oil

toothpaste- mix

  • Mix them well until they give you a paste, which will look like this:

toothpaste hand-

I use this paste twice a day either on it’s own and/or mixed with a normal toothpaste. It has a salty taste to it, so you might be better off mixing it with a normal toothpaste.

If you want you can also add activated charcoal to your baking soda and coconut toothpaste. This works but it also stains the sink. You can do it for the first 7 days and then carry on with your oil pulling and the other methods. You don’t necessarily need this. But if you insist, GO AHEAD!



3: I make a mouth wash with black pepper, cinnamon and Himalayan salt ( even sea salt is ok to use). Mix all of the ingredients with warm water and it’s ready to use.


 I love love love this mouthwash. It’s all natural, chemical free and no alcohol but it works better than Listerine. Guaranteed! plus your pocket will thank you.

Learn how to make this here: That Homemade mouthwash for healthy gums!


4: I floss at least once a week: This can be a daunting experience but it needs to be done. There just isn’t any other way! 😦 

If your teeth bleed a lot when you brush, you simply need to floss like there is no tomorrow. I’m not gonna lie, sometimes I do forget and they used to bleed but since I started oil pulling and using the electric tooth brush, using my mouth wash they are in a much better condition. Make sure you use the mouth wash during flossing though.

5: I use electric tooth brush. Now I know what you’re going to say, ” but, Bersi it’s too expensive” and I’ll say; Come on now,  if you see it as a long term investment, then you’re still winning mate.

Trust me! I used to say that to myself too and I have used Oral B Pulsar forever ( cos’ I used to get them on sale all the time and they were cheap, until they were not anymore); but it was  and still is battery operated and I got tired of buying them over and over again. The only solution was electric tooth brush and trust me,  I never regretted it.

My first experience: At first I bought the Superdrug brand cos’ I wanted to see if I was going to like it first. I thought it was good until I used Oral B Pro 600. #bestdiscoveryEver

LET ME TELL YOU!!! it is the best thing ever. It’s just the BOMB and I think everyone should have it. I bought mine on sale for £24.99 from Superdrug.

 toothbrush- oral b

Please Note: Do not brush too harshly and avoid pressing it too hard. Just place it on your teeth and let it slide gently. you’re just there to guide it through and lead it where you want it to go.  #NotaRocketScience

Teeth. Soooo needy! 🙂

Hope these tips will inspire you and make you smile 🙂

As always with Love- Bee xoxo


Beautiful scars!

Wear your scars as if they were your medals they say

They’re evidence for trying

Proof for not falling behind

For showing up and never giving up

For being brave and taking risks

For realising nothing in life is guaranteed

For not jumping into conclusions

For not betraying yourself

For daring and never listening to others

For listening to your heart and following your dreams

For facing your fears

Be proud! they show that you have lived!


Today’s quote- “The wound is the place where the light enters you”- Rumi

Always with love- Bersi xoxo

Magnesium flakes for muscle relaxation and healthy bones!

Magnesium flakes are a highly concentrated form of mineral salt also known as nature’s most potent relaxant. The flakes are excellent to deliver magnesium through the skin with essential minerals the body needs. Magnesium is vital for healthy bones and teeth and the flakes help promote the overall well-being, aid skin health and relaxing muscles. It’s deficiency contributes to insomnia, tiredness, PMS, period pain, depression, sugar cravings, muscle cramps and a lot more.


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Here’s how this precious mineral helped my health better:

1: Relief for aching muscles and joints

The flakes help my muscles and joints relax. I mean who wouldn’t want this. I tell you, this is the best thing that I’ve ever discovered.  But then again anything that comes across my path is a complete bliss! #HappyDays

I use the flakes after a workout or if I’m feeling a bit stiff, achy or if my knees are hurting; and trust me it really helps. When having a bath, I normally mix it with Epsom salt and it works wonders; but if I’m feeling lazy then I just have a foot soak with it. #RIPmusclePain.

You don’t have to mix it with epsom salt though. It’s more potent than epsom salt, so you can just use it on it’s own; but I’m a bit extra. You should know this by now… 😉

2: Bone health

Alright, so the less magnesium we have the weaker our bone density is. It’s not only Calcium that’s needed for bone strength- in fact magnesium helps the body absorb calcium. So, don’t be fooled. You can be drinking gallons of milk or even consuming dairy products but if you don’t have enough magnesium in your system it won’t get absorbed into your body. When I walk, my bones around my ankle area used to make a clicking sound. I knowww! Embarrassing right? but my magnesium intake really helped and it’s not as bad as it was before. #victory

3: Sleeping better

Well, you won’t believe this but magnesium can also help you relax and sleep better, too. Lately, I haven’t been sleeping well, too much on the mind, like everybody else I guess. But, every time I feel a bit restless, I use this magnificent salt and guess what? I sleep like an angel. I would say baby, but babies don’t sleep. I don’t even know why this expression is used. No turning or tossing!!! #noMoreSleeplessNights


Different ways of using the flakes 

1: You can have a bath with it

Dissolve 1/4 cup of Miracle Bath Flakes in warm bath water, keeping the temperature just above our body temperature. Soak for 20 – 40 minutes. Make sure the water is not too hot as you won’t get the benefit. You can do this twice a week or more if you have time.

P.S. Drink plenty of pure water when taking magnesium baths. You need to keep your body hydrated.

2: You can soak your feet in it

I sometimes prefer to take a foot-bath instead of having a bath. I just think it’s easier, especially if I’m in the mood to paint my nails, drink green tea, read or even watch my favourite TV show which is anything funny, educational or inspirational #Tedtalks

3: Of course, you can make Magnesium oil out of it

You didn’t know there was such a thing did ya? well, now you do! this is basically the laziest and the most convenient way of taking magnesium and this is how I make it:

  • Take how ever much you think you need, 1-2 teaspoons is enough if you’ve never done this before; and you can increase the amount gradually.



  • Then add 1 teaspoon of warm water to it. It will dissolve it quick enough for you to apply it to the problem areas.  I usually apply it on my joints; my knees, ankles, wrists…etc and massage it well.  It will feel and look glossy but it’s not oily at all so you can leave it on and you are free to go about your business. I usually apply it before bed as it helps me relax and sleep better.  If you’re lazy and not bothered about saving  your hard earned money, you can buy a magnesium oil but I just think it’s pricey.



Once it’s dissolved!



Where to get it:

You can get it from any health stores or even on line. It’s better to get it in bulk as it’s expensive. I get mine from Amazon or any other online health stores- which ever is cheaper really.


You need to store it in a dry place and make sue it’s not exposed to heat. The longer you leave it open and exposed to heat it will melt. So protect it well. After all it is your investment.


If it’s your first time using the magnesium oil, you might feel a little bit itchy after application which is why you need to start in small quantity. But it disappears soon so nothing to worry about here.

Today’s quote:

Keep Calm! Magnesium got your bones and muscles! 


Always with love- Bersi 🙂