What true belonging means to me.

Where do you belong?

Well darlings, this is a tough one. I have seen people struggle with it as much as I have struggled. We all want to feel we belong somewhere. Whether it is our families, our villages, our countries, our jobs, our friends, our communities…etc. But isn’t it true that belonging is fitting in? I questioned myself several times.  What happens if we don’t fit in anywhere anymore. I mean, we belong somewhere because we share something right. Whether it’s values, standards, traditions and cultures. I mean, there has to be something we have in common right. But if you start having different values, different ways of thinking, different everything than our community, would you still say, I belong with them? Would you still feel comfortable saying that’s my home? Would you still feel understood, valued and accepted?

I mean we can disagree on somethings but if the core values change, what then? This kept coming back to me.

I left home in my mid-teenage years and have had to start life over and over again. Have had to learn different languages, cultures and traditions; and I’m grateful for it. I brought my values I grew up with, with me but over the years they started changing. I mean we have to evolve in order to grow right? We can’t just be in one spot and expect to grow too. We got to keep learning and changing. But the reality of it is, we try to make our values fit with others and when they don’t work we back off and ask why it didn’t.

2018-10-05 14-50-44

we try to make anyone and everything familiar to our values home. You try to grab it and never let go of it. We be the servant because it gives us that sense of belonging. I am guilty of this because I did it over and over again. I try to replace that feeling of belonging with people who didn’t even care about me. Of course, I didn’t see it then. But I kept searching for it everywhere. But I had no luck.

I didn’t know I didn’t have to do things to feel and be accepted and I certainly didn’t have to prove anything to anyone so I can belong.

And I failed to understand that home is not where I left it. It is not with a bunch of people. I finally understood that Home is me. It always has been. Home is where I go. Home is my head and my heart. Home is me. Because I kept coming back to myself. I kept coming back to my heart. And I reached a conclusion that no matter where I go there is my home. You cannot escape yourself. You’ll always be carrying you around, so you better make that a comfortable home. Respect your home, clean your home, love your home. And you will see a much loved, happy, cared for and respected home will attract curiosity and will attract homes just like it.

…And when you find someone who’s just what you were looking for; well, they can be your second home 🙂

Hope these words stay with you 🙂

With love- Bersi x

 

 

 

 

 

Failure! what failure?!

Failure! a topic that is too sensitive, perhaps underrated and less talked about. In a society full of flashy objects and picture perfect life, we don’t dare to talk about our failures. Jeeze! how could we? we’re too busy editing pictures and pretending to be too perfect. No body broadcasts their failures and brag about them.  If we pay attention, everything we see around us is a result of accumulated failures. We only see the finished product and not how it got here.

It’s ok to lose and fail sometimes you know. We shouldn’t be scared to fail. In fact, the more we fail  the closer we get to making it. Failure is part of the game. It is part of life.  I think failure is not the opposite of success. Fear is the opposite of success. Failure is just part of the journey and success.

I think the issue is not failing but perhaps not getting up and fighting back again. Because it’s easier to give up. The more you fail, the more you know how to deal with it and position yourself better for the next time you mess up. 🙂

 

20180819_162246 (1)

 

We get headaches when we overthink things and when we worry too much about failing. Some people don’t like to fail at all and so they don’t try. I’d say not trying is a massive failure and a risky business.

If you think about it, we have a 50/50 chance. Why focus our beautiful mind on failing. What if we don’t. This is precisely the reason why I’m not scared to play with fire. Because I know it is part of success. I do it knowing it could burn me but I don’t want to miss out on the lessons and the growth I could get from it. It helps me recognise the areas where I need to work on and it definitely helps me get closer to where want to get.

 

failure quote.

Thomas Edison made 1000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When he got asked, how did it feel to fail 1000 times? he replied, “I did’t fail 1000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1000 steps.“. What a Gangster response!!! my kind of man.

Fear is just an illusion. We feed it sooo much energy that we begin to believe it is real.

Let’s begin our journey planning to win but if we don’t, at least we’ll get some valuable experience out of it. In the end, we’re not really failing are we? Well, it depends which angle we’re looking at it from.

failure quote 2.

Having said that though, I was not like this all the time. In fact I used to run the opposite direction of fear and would not do anything because I was too afraid to fail. #Notanymore

Remember we always have a choice. we get to choose which attitude we’re gonna wear. What does your outfit look like today?

Always with Love- Bersi x0x0

 

I’m everything and nothing at all!

I am everything and nothing at all

Sometimes I want to be quiet and sometimes celebrate
I love those who have energy and jump around and I am that,
But at times I just want to meditate and leave it at that.
Sometimes I want to hold hands and take it slow,
But other times I want to jump in the ocean and play with the storm
You know playing with words is what I adore, but then I also like a movie & a popcorn

Sometimes I hold on tight to what I have, but other times I don’t care if all is lost
I love it when you tell me you love me, but other times it’s enough when you hold me
And we all love it when people sympathise with us but tough love we also appreciate.
Sometimes we want to be healthy but then we also celebrate being lazy
And don’t we all love honesty but the kind less brutal & easy

we love to share but we don’t like it when they’re too nosy

I admire flexibility, and I don’t mind changing but without losing my identity

you see- It’s not because I have endless personalities
But because, darling!  I am everything
And without it, I’m also nothing!!!

look around, pay attention and see if you’re experiencing something ….anything?

Love always, yours Bee x0x0

Safe journey!

Oh darling, you must not know me

If you leave, it’s not because of me

If you stay, it’s not because of me

But because of your poor soul, who was unable to see the light in me

 

I will keep shining even when you don’t see me

I will never stop growing even when you’re not near me

This time I’m stronger and a lot wiser

So nothing can get to the self which is higher than ever

 

You see, I choose to see the best in people’s souls

Even yours, which needed saving and was crying for happiness

Darling that wasn’t up to me but to thy self

You were looking in the wrong places

I tried to make you see it but I couldn’t get past your stubbornness

 

The time we had was beautiful and cherished every minute of it

You were free from the very start

Supported you 100% on your new path

But all I can say for now is….

No tears

No regrets

Only the beautiful memories will last

I wish you endless happiness and love

I wish, you truly find yourself and all the love that you have

I wish you only the very best and nothing less in life!

Always with love- Bee 😘😘